What soothes your soul? And what is your trauma trigger?
I’ll preface this with something I learned through doing tons of fetish modeling gigs…. I have learned that fetishes are often rooted in something traumatic or impactful that happened to a child, as they mature into adulthood, that old memory grows into a fascination. I have a theory that my “fetish” (if you want to call it that, I may call it undying love…) for the sound of an acoustic guitar stems from my early childhood: On the good nights, my younger sisters and I were put to bed, and fell asleep to the soothing sound of my dad’s bar chords echoing from down the hall, while he led his bible study or practiced Jesus music.
On the bad nights, it was hard to fall asleep because we had to listen to my father yelling at my mother. I couldn’t imagine what my mom could have done to deserve that kind of anger… to me she seemed like the best human in the world: the kindest, most beautiful, best mom ever. But boy was my dad mad… I still remember it, but to this day he boasts that him and my mom “never even had a single argument their whole marriage”… I guess he doesn’t realize I can remember those nights when it was hard to get to sleep….
Please tell me… what is soothing to you…?